5 Reasons Why You Can Not Change People


Accept people the way they are, not demanding that they be the way you want. You do not go through life wishing, hoping and expecting that people will change and be different so as to suit you. One of the basic principles of human life is that, with few expectations. People don’t change.

In fact, under pressure, people not only do not change, but they become even more of what they already are inside. If a person has a difficult personality, under pressure he will become even more difficult. If someone is stubborn, when put under she will become even more stubborn. If a person is slightly dishonest, when he is subjected to pressure or temptation he will become dishonest. People don’t change.

What we don’t understand is that when it comes to change, it all depends on the individual. If a person is not ready for change, there is nothing anybody can do about it. For example, take a person who is addicted to smoking he\she has gotten use to smoking that they find it very difficult to break that habit. Then you come along and say you want to you change such person. Well try, but you can’t! It takes the individual to decide for themselves that they are tired of their way and ready to change. What you can do however, is to guide them.

5 reasons why you cannot change people

1 Their habits

Read HABITS. Most of our behaviors are habitual; therefore whatever we do every day tends to form a habit for us.  Habit is that thing a person does often and almost without thinking, especially something that is hard to stop doing. We get conditioned to our habit. Habit are routines of behavior that are repeated regularly, tend to occur subconsciously, without directly thinking consciously about them.

So you tell me how you intend to change such as person that is conditioned to as certain type of habit, especially when it’s a bad habit. It will mean you have to spend every single second, minute and day with that person for a very long time to be able to make sure they form a different habit. What you can do however is to try your best by advising and encouraging them to be a better person. The rest is up to them to make a change for themselves. Read 7 HABITS THAT LEADS TO SUCCESS AND FAILURE it will guild you to form habits that will make you a better person.

2 They see no error in their ways

How can you change a person that seem to think what they are doing is what makes them who they are? When a person enjoys what they are doing and feels it makes them happy, then they don’t see any reason to change their ways. A person who is constantly doing what is wrong and doesn’t care about what anyone thinks because they feel there is nothing wrong in what they are doing. They see no error in their ways; they don’t see the need to change their ways. Trust me when I say you can’t change such a person. What you can do however is to change their thinking. The rest is up to them.

3 They don’t feel courageous enough

Change can be scary. Doing things for the first time or stepping into the unknown can pretty frightening. They may feel like they need some courage to make those changes they want, to take those first steps.
They have to be willing to take action, to move out of their comfort zone and to face fear to increase their courage and self-confidence in a way that stays with them. They have to be willing to take the punch and risk some emotional pain for a while.  A lot of people want to make positive changes to their lives but they are too scared to make the necessaries changes because they are not confident enough that things will change for the better. So they choose to remain how and where they are. 

Don’t try to change that person because you can’t but try to build their confidence and make them stronger. That way they will confident and strong enough to make the change themselves. Read 12 THINGS CONFIDENT PEOPLE DO and also read WHY YOUNEED COURAGE TO SUCCEED IN LIFE.

4 They put their problems before anything else

They say the reason they cannot change is because of their problems. They keep giving excuses how their problems are the main reason why they can’t change.  They give excuses like- I smoke because it helps me forget my problems, I keep different women because my wife keeps nagging, I fight because I have a very hot temper, I lie because that’s the easy way to get what I want, I don’t help people because that’s the only way I can stay rich, I curse and swear because that’s the way i grew up, I pretend because that’s the only way to get what I want, I over spend because that’s the only way to get people to like me. 

They just keep giving reasons upon reasons why they can’t change.  Sad isn’t it? Well i dare you to try and change such a person and see where that gets you. What you can do however is to make that person understand the implications and consequences if they continue to follow that part. “You can lead a horse to the water, but you can’t make it drink.” Read SIX STEPS TO HIGH-PERFORMANCE LIVING.

5 They feel they know what’s best for them

No matter what you say, how you say it or how many times you say it, they will keep doing the same thing. They don’t need you to tell them what to do; because they think , they know what they are doing. They don’t want to see things your way; they only see things the way they want to see them. And the funny thing is even when we know that they are wrong, we still keep trying our best to make them see reasons and make them understand that their way is the wrong way. But still they keep doing the same thing. The best way to deal with such people is to stop correcting them and let them do what they feel is best for them.  

Am not saying you should give-up on them but when soon when they get tired of the way they living and the amount of mistakes they have made, then they might realize its time for them to make a change. But it’s only them that can make that decision themselves. I just hope for their seek; it’s not too late before they realize their mistakes. But you can keep trying your best to keep guiding them. read WHY PRETEND?







5 Reasons Why You Can Not Change People 5 Reasons Why You Can Not Change People Reviewed by The news cable on September 14, 2015 Rating: 5

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